Thursday, March 1, 2012

Wit Of Famous Persons

1. Thomas Reed Vs. Henry Clay

2. Winston Churchill Vs. Lady Astor

3. NY Mayor Ed Koch Vs. Andrew Kirtzman
After the reporter insisted on pressing a point about an inconsistent statement Koch had made.

4. Groucho Marx Vs. A Contestant on “You Bet Your Life”
After the contestant revealed that he was a father of 10.

5. Abraham Lincoln Vs. Stephen Douglas
After Douglas called him “two-faced” during a debate:

6. Calvin Coolidge Vs. An Opera Singer

7. Pierre Trudeau Vs. Richard Nixon
Upon hearing that Nixon had called him an a--hole.

8. Oscar Wilde Vs. Lewis Morris
Morris had just been passed over for the Poet Laureateship.

9. Mohandas Gandhi Vs. Western Civilization

10. Miriam Hopkins Vs. An Anonymous Singer

11. James McNeill Whistler Vs. Oscar Wilde<
After Whistler had made a particularly witty observation.

12. Senator Fritz Hollings Vs. Henry McMastor
When challenged by his Republican opponent during a televised debate to take a drug test.

13. Bill Clinton Vs. Dan Quayle
After Quayle revealed that he planned to be “a pit bull” in the 1992 campaign against Clinton and Gore.

14. Niels Bohr Vs. A Reporter

15. Reverend Edward Everett Hale Vs. The U.S. Senate
When asked if he prayed for the Senators.

16. Edna Ferber Vs. Noel Coward
Coward was remarking upon the fact that Ferber was wearing a tailored suit.

17. Henry Clay Vs. Massachusetts Senator Daniel Webster
After seeing a pack of mules walk by.

18. Winston Churchill Vs. a Member Of Parliament

19. Alcibiades Vs. Pericles

20. Calvin Coolidge Vs. Some Random Lady At A White House Dinner

Probably the most frequently told story about Coolidge is the one where an important hostess told him why he had to talk to her: "You must talk to me Mr. Coolidge. I made a bet today that I could get more than two words out of you." Coolidge told her: "You lose." When he was Governor of Massachusetts, a woman asked him if he had participated in athletics while he was at Amherst. He said: "Yes, I held the stakes."

21. Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart Vs. An Admirer

No comments: